Back before the holidays, I started sharing a Marriage Monday series with you about three ways to bring good to your husband, and we started digging in to the first way to show love to your husband: respect. With the holidays behind us, and as I’m finding time to write again, I’d really like to finish this. (I don’t like leaving things unfinished!)

{You can find all “She Brings Him Good” series posts here.}

Three Ways to “Bring Him Good”

#1 – Respect Him

– Respect Him Through Submission

– Respect Him With the Words We Speak

– Respect Him By Trusting Him

We have looked at respecting our husbands through biblical submission and by watching the words we speak to them and about them, and there’s one more quick little thing I want to talk about: showing respect when we TRUST them.

Sometimes that’s hard to trust, and show trust, when we aren’t sure our husband is making the right decision. I have been there. Many times. My husband would be the first to admit a few times that he has made some unwise decisions in our 17+ years of marriage.

So what do you do when you want to trust your husband but you don’t trust the decision he is making? You trust God. I’m serious. Take it to God, pour your heart out, let him work it out, maybe he’ll change your husband’s mind, maybe he won’t, maybe he will change YOUR mind, but I know I can trust God in every situation.

In every single situation I could name, God took care of us. Sometimes there were some undesirable consequences to deal with, sometimes we were spared. Every single time, my husband learned and grew through it and became a better husband. (And through trusting God and showing grace to my husband, I learned how to become a better wife.) 

Now this isn’t all to suggest that you can’t or shouldn’t speak up. Many times I have voiced my concerns, and advised against a certain decision. Giving wise counsel is in no way disrespectful or unsubmissive  (as long as it’s done respectfully of course – there we are watching those words again,) and as I’ve said before, a marriage relationship is a TEAM relationship. We are in this together.

But I have also made it clear to my husband that when I don’t think a decision is wise, I will of course defer the final decision making to him. Every time we have some decision to make, whether I agree or not, I also pray for my husband’s discernment–but especially when I’m not sure he’s being wise. And in doing so, I leave it up to God to lead my husband in wisdom, speak to my husband’s heart, and soften it to receive wisdom. In doing so, we leave it all in God’s hands, and we look to Him to carry us through the it.

This may not seem like it’s a sign of respect, but it is, because you are letting your husband learn to lead your family in wisdom without fighting him for control over it, and that’s a huge sign of respect for his headship. 

So trust God, and ask him to help you trust the man that he gave you. If you ask, I know He will help you. 

The LORD is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you. Psalm 9:9-10 ESV

Next time, we will be moving on from “Respect,” and into a second area of need our husbands have. And it’s probably not what you’re thinking. (Not yet anyway–but we’ll get there!)

Image Source: Public Domain