Marriage Monday ~ Initiative-Taking

When I think of taking initiative, I think of the Proverbs 31 Woman. I know, she’s a common example, and I know she’s often over-glorified. The Proverbs 31 Woman seems unobtainable to some, makes others cringe, is put on a pedestal by many… but GIRL, she’s the perfect example when we’re talking about being an initiative-taking woman!

Seriously:

The Woman Who Fears the Lord

An excellent wife who can find?
She is far more precious than jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good, and not harm,
all the days of her life.
She seeks wool and flax,
and works with willing hands.
She is like the ships of the merchant;
she brings her food from afar.
She rises while it is yet night
and provides food for her household
and portions for her maidens.
She considers a field and buys it;
with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
She dresses herself with strength
and makes her arms strong.
She perceives that her merchandise is profitable.
Her lamp does not go out at night.
She puts her hands to the distaff,
and her hands hold the spindle.
She opens her hand to the poor
and reaches out her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of snow for her household,
for all her household are clothed in scarlet.
She makes bed coverings for herself;
her clothing is fine linen and purple.
Her husband is known in the gates
when he sits among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them;
she delivers sashes to the merchant.
Strength and dignity are her clothing,
and she laughs at the time to come.
She opens her mouth with wisdom,
and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
She looks well to the ways of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
“Many women have done excellently,
but you surpass them all.”
Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain,
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands,
and let her works praise her in the gates.

Check out all those verbs! And no where in there does it say, “she waits for her husband to point out the growing laundry pile and mock it.” Okay sure, maybe we can’t ALL be wonderful seamstresses and great cooks and excellent housekeepers, and wise businesswomen, and stay at home teachers, and the whole nine yards. I think what’s important to take away here is that she is diligent and helpful and she takes initiative.

It reminds me of the saying from the movie, Robots, “See a need, Fill a need.”

The thing is, something I’ve been deeply pondering lately, I’m IN CHARGE of my household. I’m not just the maintenance person, I’m in authority over my household. Under God and my husband, I have been put here by God and trusted by my husband to take care of things.

Too often I see myself as the daily mundane task doer.

Or the sibling rivalry referee.

Or the head of the questions and complaints department.

I think God and my husband want more out of me than just someone who keeps the ball rolling, don’t you think?

See a need? Meet it. See an opportunity to serve? Take it. Something needs to be done? Do it. Kids need to be disciplined? Take charge. Chores need to be done? Make it so. Bills need to be paid? Get on it. Of course, I’m not going to run off and get new tires without consulting my husband, but consulting him and then doing it counts as taking initiative in my book. And I’m not going to run off in my own strength and wisdom when training the kids or pursuing opportunities but consulting God and praying about it to make a decision and then acting on that decision is the initiative that’s needed.

I’m also going to add: Bed time? Get in there. Alarm’s going off? Get up. Time to meet with God? Go! Saturday preparations for Sunday? Make it happen. Sunday worship, rest and family time? Make it so. We can’t run on no sleep, no rest and on our own strength. It’s not going to happen; we’re going to burn out. So make these happen, too.

I definitely need a heaping helping of this. I don’t take the initiative to get things done NEARLY well enough, and I know that this would please my husband, make me a better wife and mother, help things run more smoothly around here. I’m still working on being diligent and helpful and all of the other things we’ve talked about and now I’m adding this to the list, too.

God give me the diligence, the self-control, the time management skills, the wise decision making, and the motivation to take the initiative to get things done when I see they need to be done. Change my heart, Lord, help me to seek your will. Help me to remember that I have been trusted with this responsibility and help me become a wife in whom “the heart of her husband trusts in her.” Amen.

If you would like to join in, the rules are simple. Link up an encouraging post about marriage with the direct url to the post. Next week’s word is “Joyful” Join us then for more Marriage Monday!

{I’ve also linked this up to Big Family Friday at Holy Spirit-led Homeschooling, a linky of encouraging posts for larger families. I don’t *feel* like a larger family when so many of my friends have 4-8 kids! But I have learned that managing a house with three kids often goes more smoothly if I listen to their advice! Hop over and check it out.}